How to unlock emotions
How To Feel Your Emotions (What To Do if you Cant Feel Your Emotions) - Teal Swan -
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Hello there, your emotions are like a compass. Just like an actual compass tells you where you are in [space]
Your emotions tell you what your personal vibration is
Knowing your personal vibration, then allows you to know how to increase that personal frequency so as to go in the direction of your desires
Also your emotions are your doorway to your subconscious mind to [what's] limiting you from getting to where you desire?
So not being in touch with your emotions
Is the same as not having a compass and being stranded out in the middle of the sea?
naturally people want to feel good and
Naturally if you left them to their own devices they would gravitate in the direction of what felt good
However our wires get a bit crossed during [the] process of socialization
during the process of socialization we learn that many things that feel good are in fact bad and
many things that feel bad are in fact good according to the social group that we grow up in and
When this happens we develop this let's say coping mechanism. Which is to override our negative emotions
Obviously if your compass is screaming at you, you're going in the wrong direction
And you're going to keep going in that direction you have to tune out the compass
To compound things further because we do not collectively understand what emotions are and what purpose they serve
We are essentially living in an emotional [Dark] [age] this means that society has made emotions in and of themselves a bad thing
and that means that during the process of socialization children are punished for having certain emotions as a result they dissociate from
Reject Deny and disown those emotions they then grow up to suppress these emotions and deny the fact that they even have them
People in general struggle with their emotions people in general don't understand what emotions are people in general
Struggle to relate to their own emotions
So it's kind of epidemic
However, there is a small percentage of people on the planet or even more disconnected than the general
group
These are people who are so disconnected from their own emotions who ignored their internal compass to such a degree
[that] it is as if they cannot even feel emotion
Now this is a major problem
because obviously
If you want to know how to heal your life, if you want to know, what direction to [go] in to feel better
But you can't feel at all
You're lost in the middle of the sea without a compass
So it's almost like the healing that needs to take place in their life in order to actually go in the direction of what feels
Good to manifest the things that they desire is
Held up. It can't even occur until they get in touch with their emotions
The first thing you need to understand is that the emotional system can't actually break so your body your being is constantly
Informing you about what emotions you feel regardless of whether or not you [are] actually listening
This is good news for those of you who feel like you can't feel it
Means that you don't have to try to get emotions to occur in the body
They're already occurring all you have to do is start noticing that they're occurring
What has happened in Essence?
Is that the compass has started to scream at you and screamed at you has probably been screaming at you for years that you're going?
In the wrong direction, and you've ignored it so much that you [don't] even recognize it anymore when it's talking to you
In other words you do not need to work on [getting] your body to feel as if something is broken what you need to do
Is to train your own consciousness [to] perceive again?
when someone is first learning to ski they cannot feel the fluctuations of the conditions below their skis an
Expert would be able to feel every tiny little nuance
for example the conditions of the snow and
Those nuances would not feel minor. They would feel major to somebody who is an expert, but to a novice
It's not perceivable. It's only when you start to practice
tuning into those nuances that they become loud instead of very very soft [an]
emotion works this exact same way
What may seem subtle to you to begin with two years down the road will seem like a siren?
Also, I have to state here that it is really common if you identify yourself as someone who can't feel
That you don't recognize feeling as feeling for example
You feel frustrated [that] you can't feel not realizing that the frustration in and of itself is a feeling that's occurring in your body somewhere
Otherwise you wouldn't even know you're frustrated
So what should you do if you feel like you can't feel and you want to learn how to feel?
Step [1]
the world in General approves that the mind and disapproves of
Emotions emotions are messy right so we don't like those things
So what happens is that we are?
terrified of emotions
Obviously if we [grow] up in a society that says that these things are bad
And you have to be good to be a part of us. We are going to try to do anything
We can to hide from those things. We naturally develop a fear of our own emotion
So what do you do if you're afraid of your own emotion when you're a small [child], and you can't escape from your own body?
You disconnect from your own body?
You dissociate you escape with your focus you put all of your focus which is consciousness
Either in the outside world external to you or into your own thoughts
This is what it means when someone says you're stuck in the mind
Pretty soon only your subconscious rules over your body and consciously you are disembodied, so to speak
To reverse this you have to commit [to] the practice of bringing your focus back to the body
Emotions may seem abstract when you don't feel because chances are your conceptualizing of emotions?
What you have to understand about emotions? Is that emotions are nothing more than sensations that have been named?
When we say we have anxiety what does that mean it means that [our] chest feels?
Constricted it means that inside we feel this contained racing sensation
We may feel heat somewhere in our body this uncontrollable urge devos
Sensations when they reacted to certain experiences
That they decided to call it anxiety
One of the reasons people can't feel is that they can set
size of the idea of anxiety but do not relate to emotions in terms of
sensations that take place in their body
So if you're trying to feel I'm going to give you an exercise that I want you to commit [to] I?
Want you to get a timer and have that timer go off at certain intervals?
For some people this will be 10 minutes for some people this will be every hour
[I] want you to pick a time slot that is manageable for you in every single time that timer goes off
I want you to take your focused attention
Direct it in towards your body
Scan your body to see if you can feel any sensation
I don't need you to understand what the sensation is no questioning about it
Just take note of the sensation in a little journal that you buy
So when the timer goes off I'll close my eyes
I'll scan myself with my focus. I might feel heat in the bridge of my [nose]. [I] may feel a tightening in my stomach
You're going to write down any sensation that you have I?
want you to do that first part of the exercise for one week and
Then you're going to do another week, where you add something to that practice
What you're going to do while you're doing the same practice at the same interval?
Is that this time you're going to see if any of those sensations can be described as emotions?
You may want to print off a sheet?
Describing all of the different emotions
So that when you feel those sensations
You can cross compare the list and see if any of them are a match if so
Write that down if not leave it as it is also if you experience something that causes stronger sensations
And you like an argument [with] someone or doing something fun?
Take advantage of this opportunity to do the exercise as well regardless of whether your timer has gone off or not after
[those] two weeks are up you're going to do another exercise [for] one week, which is an add-on to the previous two weeks
You're going to do the same thing you did in the last two weeks however this time you're going to ask yourself the question. Why?
Why am I feeling these sensations can I identify any?
Precursor that may be causing these sensations and thus emotions to occur within me
Some maybe as simple as I was stirring too long at a computer others
[maybe] something like you realized you had a thought about being really poor and how terrible that would be in started to feel panic as
A result do that for a week?
this [three-week] process of
[self-Awareness] is like a reset the tunes [you're] [into] your emotional system
After those three weeks are up if you like this exercise
I suggest that you continue it or you can wean yourself off of it and eventually
Just get to the point where you're [naturally] doing this and you don't need to write it [down] where you feel a sensation?
You think about whether that sensation could be described as an emotion you think about what precursor there was to that emotion?
[-] if you are [unable] to feel
It's pretty much a guarantee that you experience trauma relative to feeling in and of itself
So let's pretend that something bad happens if something bad happens that's unresolved we could call [that] a trauma
Now traumas that's a pure emotion something like my grandmother died and so I felt grief
but if the real trauma the unresolved issue is
about somebody shaming you for your grief or
Trying to get you out of your grief too fast or telling you
It's not okay to feel grief or punishing you because you felt grief
Then there is trauma relative to feeling grief in and of itself
It must be said here that in general people who cannot feel had caregivers in their childhood that were dismissive in their style of attachment
This means they were threatened by intimacy especially emotional intimacy and so they value
independence and even though they may meet the child's basic needs they fail to be able to meet the child's emotional needs and even
Discourage and Dismiss the child's bids for intimacy and closeness
the child is forced to get their needs met and stay on their parents good sides by not threatening their [parent] and
Not threatening the dismissive parent means
acting like they have no needs acting like they have no emotions and getting a self sufficient as possible and
Dismissing their own emotions to the point that they lose the capacity to feel them
This dismissive attachment style often causes an avoidant attachment style in the child when they grow up
To resolve these traumas that cause you to disconnect from your own feeling so as to become okay with feeling again
Do the completion [process] [I] offer a detailed description [about] how to do this process in my book titled the completion process
But if you cannot feel I suggest you use the technique that [I] offer on page
139
3 when people can't feel that suggests an extreme fear of [loosing] control
Now we don't come up [with] this fear out of nowhere. It's not like a baby's born terrified of losing control we learn that
Now chances are you experienced something whether you remember it or not that made you feel so powerless to feeling good again
That your body kind of kicked into a survival mechanism
Just like the body kicks in to the survival mechanism of shock on a physical level
You [can] consider shock on an emotional level a state of numbness
Where the body basically says you know I can't do anything to make myself feel better here. Let's not feel anything
That includes both negative and positive emotions
Now this is probably going to be the hardest part for those of you who can't feel to accept
is that even though you stand in front of someone like me [a] teacher or
Psychologist or whatever and you say I really want [to] learn how to feel again
You got to realize there's a big part of you that in fact doesn't
There's a big part of you that wants nothing to do with emotions
Nothing to do with feeling out of control because there's a link between the [two] in your mind
You would feel unless there is a negative consequence associated with feeling
So the time has come to face this fear
And how do you do it you do it by admitting that this is in fact what's going on with you?
That there is this part of you that doesn't want to feel that. This is how your being is coping
Then you consciously make a choice
You consciously make the choice are there to avoid emotions completely or you consciously make the choice
To feel feelings and to do that you've got [to] dredge up and face all the things you're trying to escape from
You've got to release your resistance to being out of control
Try to find the core belief behind. I don't want to feel by watching my video titled how to change a core belief
you can also imagine the worst case scenario of being totally out of control as a result of feeling and
Use the sensation of that fear as your doorway for the completion process so as to discover
What trauma that Fear is coming from and to resolve it?
step 4 sometimes the unwillingness to feel comes from the fact that in our society if
All motions aren't disapproved of usually the negative emotions are disapproved of so it's not okay to feel bad and yet you do
so the first thing you got to realize is that it's more than okay to not feel good [as] a society we have an
Obsession with
Feeling good as if there's a some sort of failure that took place or something's really wrong with you if you don't feel good all
The time [I] mean somebody loses their family in half the world they get a pill for it as if grief isn't
Acceptable to go through so first thing
I want [you] to start looking at your concept around feeling [emotion] itself is
Negative emotion wrong is positive emotion wrong
Because chances are if you can't feel you've made emotion wrong
step 5 do things that are radically radically new
Get way outside your comfort zone. Take on new Challenges
You have to shake up your system so as to experience different sensations
Your acclimatize to your current life so you don't experience noticeable changes in your feelings. This has been your subconscious way of gaining control
So try new activities do different kinds of art and self-expression travel to different places meet different people try activities
Where you will experience new sensations and pay close attention to those new sensations you experience as a result of doing those things
six
Circling back a tiny bit to what we previously discussed
Without even realizing it if you can't feel emotions you in fact avoid things that cause you to feel emotions
You are unaware of how avoidant you are of things you want to avoid or face
Especially those things that cause you to feel strong emotion
you also subconsciously have all kinds of coping techniques to avoid an escape from feeling, so
[if] you want to feel what should you do?
Throw yourself into experiences you would normally avoid because they cause emotions
This means spend some time around [people] that annoy the hell out of you and cause you to feel emotions watch movies that evoke strong
sensations within your being and
Then what I want you to do when you're doing these activities that you would Normally avoid
Is I want you to feel how horrible it feels?
Feel that part of you that resists it in every way that wants to escape that once they leave the movie theater that wants to
Walk away from that friend watch for your own coping mechanisms in the way that you yourself shut down your emotion
When you're in scenarios that cause emotion to Arise
Choose consciously not to engage in these coping mechanisms, but to feel them and observe them instead
7 if you can't feel chances are you are?
Really really really based in your mind. You're attached to your mind your mind as to what you feel really really confident with
It's not necessarily a terribly negative thing. It's just that because it's an overcompensation. That's no longer healthy
But your mind is going to prevent you [from] getting into your emotions because the ego tells it look rescue me out of this crap
It's going to get me in trouble
Basically your minds been trying to save you from emotions forever that means it's a good idea for you to
Get your mind enrolled in the idea of actually participating in you feeling emotions
for that reason
Let your mind learn about emotions
The mind and the emotion is like two separate languages
You can use your mind to go to work to help you or enable you to learn to speak the language of emotion
so instead [of] trying to
Suppress, and I reject reduce on your mind
Just start to bring it in so that there's more coherence between your mind [and] the emotion self
I
Suggest you watch four of my videos for the sake of your mind getting on board with your decision [to] feel more
The first is titled emptiness how to stop feeling empty
The second is the emotional wake-up call
the third is how to heal the [emotional] body and
The fourth is happiness as the purpose of your life want to know why?
your emotional guidance system
Cannot be broken it is always available to you
The minute that you should decide to tune back into it to perceive it in a way where you can let it guide you through
life
So try these techniques and soon you will find that feeling anything even if it is unpleasant is better than feeling nothing
Have a good week
you you
you
