How to not get chosen for jury duty
How to Get Out of Jury Duty (Things Not To Say)
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Jury duty, should be fun. Things you shouldn't say to try to get out of jury
duty. So, just got back from jury duty and most people probably aren't looking
forward to jury duty I was kind of looking forward to it
then I got on a criminal case I'm like this is exciting like this could be the
OJ case, except that i have like so much going on that I'm like I can't even be
here I'm about to have a panic attack and how did I get here
but I'd done so many continuances and I really would like to do jury duty I
believe it's our civic responsibility anyways it did seem like there a lot of
people there who are pretty excited to be there and a lot of people who did not
want to be there so that's what I want to talk to you about things you
shouldn't say to try to get out of jury duty
so the judge puts all the potential jurors in the box and then he goes
through and asked them a series of questions right and I'm thinking I can
probably I'm probably gonna get dismissed but I'm not in the first jury
box so they called the first like 14 people I think before lunch and he goes
through every single one of them and it's like 1147 and I'm like oh shoot now
I gotta wait for the whole afternoon before I give my turn in the box I'm
like dang it but then suddenly they stipulated to release one of the jurors
and then I'm like and they called my number and they're like juror number I
don't know if I can say my number even I don't know why but I'm like paranoid
about this kind of stuff now so they called my number and I couldn't help
myself I go yes oh you can see remember
I'm such an idiot ah no wonder anyways they called my
number and I go yes and then I couldn't help it I didn't mean for that to be so
loud and excited obviously they're like 200 people in the room I was in the way
back so I didn't know the judge even saw then he goes um young lady this is not
the price is right I'm like me it is for me because I want to get out of here
before anyways back to things you should not say when you're trying to get off of
jury duty so here's one of the ladies replies Eagles okay so let me ask you
ma'am um do you believe that you can sit on this
jury and and provide your unbiased opinion of the guilt or innocence of
this individual and she said um no I don't think so and he goes oh okay when
inking explain to us why Simek illogical reasonable person and she
um I just hate robbery did she just really say that really come on now she
didn't really just say that did she Oh cuz all the but the rest of us we
love robbery in fact we specifically asked for a robbery case because we love
robbers robbers on the back I'm like chin just say that okay then here's
another one the guy goes on ok so how do you feel about serving on this jury
should you be selected he goes you know I don't feel too good about it Josh to
be honest I've had a couple bad weeks I kind of don't want to be here he's like
well I appreciate that you know we all go through tough times but is it
something specific that would preclude you from being here like that would fit
the legal definition of why you would be excused to serve mean wise like 50 and
and like you just know I don't want to judge but look let's just say he has
whole reason why you want to be there was because his mom and he's like 50
it's like my mom's not been feeling well and then she hurt her knee and she's
diabetic and and my wife's real used to me making her breakfast every morning
and Your Honor I just feel like it's just like one less thing I have to deal
with this my wife expected me to make her breakfast anymore I'm like is this
real life are people really this big nuran like sorry but really you think
you're gonna be excused from jury duty because you normally make your wife
breakfast leave her a pop-tart on the kitchen counter for pete's sake there's
a man's life hanging here in balance and you're worried about how your wife is
gonna make herself breakfast morning whatever okay let's see oh oh the best I
can t make this up I'm not even this funny I couldn't write this stuff it
just happens and I happen to be there and literally like everyone's answers
probably including mine we're pretty funny so this guy's like um hey your
honor your jaw your honor um so like uh I just graduate from college and and he
goes okay great um and are you working and he said well I got like this um gig
at like a local club down by Newport Bay and stuff and so like um I plans with my
friends cuz like I just graduate from college I was we were like thinking of
like kickin it the summer and I was planning kicking it this summer to
like really you gotta say your plans to kick it this summer he said that and
then he's like okay do you have a trip planning oh well actually your honor
we're thinking like wherever fourth of July we're gonna head up to Tahoe it's
like okay so do you give a flight that can't be changed and he goes we're
really gonna just like like basically carpool and like you know I can't really
even say like when I could come back because we're just thinking about like
you know like living like your honor we just finished like four and a half five
years school and like we're just thinking about like kicking and stuff
and like we have a plan like a whole bunch of people and and so I really
don't know when we'll be back and so I'm like I can't wait for my drink cuz I've
got like a legit experience like I've got a little chit reason why should not
be a member of this jury and I'm like um well actually I am involved right now in
a very serious FBI crime and I don't like robbers either I don't want any
kind of robber out like bank robbers I don't like stick them up robbers and I
don't like Instagram robbers so I really think I'm gonna have a very difficult
time being impartial I don't like robbers of any kind and
then the nice that I was wrong with the idiotic answer I'm like um yeah so it's
regarding on my social media and so I've been robbed of is it is like way bigger
than that but whenever I have to give like the short answer it sounds so dumb
I mean we're talking tens of thousands of dollars that were lost when we had
our cyber hack beyond that even but nonetheless when you like when it's
described to someone like the short answer what happened it sounds so dumb
like yeah I had my Twitter hacked and then I had my Instagram hacked and then
they named my Instagram account fatty priests like it sounds so dumb but
nonetheless he said okay um and he asked the first attorneys like do we stipulate
to excuse mrs. Johnson and the other turn you're doing stipulate to excuse
mr. Johnson and they said yes we do and I'm like oh I'm like so exciting because
okay mrs. Johnson why don't we ask you to come back when things settle down a
little bit in September I'm like alright that's fine I'm kind of excited to do
jury duty I would love to get on a case and be an impartial witness I really
would I believe in our justice system I at
least believe that we need more qualified people sitting on our jury so
y'all when you get that notice to do your civic duty and show up and get on a
jury do it otherwise you have a bunch of people who like are using their cat
litter box as a reason why they shouldn't be on the jury you want some
smart people because we've the best I mean it's not perfect
puts a lot of innocent people away but we do happen to have one of the world's
best legal systems as crappy as it is as flawed as it is it's only as good as the
individuals who are sitting on those jury panels right so I'm gonna go back
and I'm gonna get on jury and it's gonna be fun but it'll be at a different time
so leave me you're funny jury duty experiences in
the comments section below oh and hey don't forget to like this
video and if you haven't already please subscribe thank you for joining me in
this car chat oh you might notice that my car is sitting still I'm not driving
cuz y'all got so mad last time bye bye
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