finding out that your girlfriend has
been cheating on you can be incredibly
difficult
but if it happens to you try to stay
calm
if you can spend a little time apart
before you confront your girlfriend
about what happened that way your
conversation will be less likely to turn
into an angry argument
when you're apart take some time to
reflect on how you're feeling and where
you want to go from here
for instance are you ready to end the
relationship or do you want to try to
make it work
if you're interested in working things
out
think about what will have to change in
order for your relationship to recover
for instance you might decide that you
need your girlfriend to give you a
sincere apology or that you need to set
some relationship ground rules together
to help prevent something like this from
happening again
once you're ready to talk to your
girlfriend sit down somewhere private
where you won't be distracted or
interrupted
let her know how you feel about what
happened but try to focus on your own
feelings instead of pointing fingers or
making personal attacks
for instance say something like i feel
so hurt by what happened between you and
jeremy
i love you and i want to make things
work
but it's going to be hard for me to
trust you after this
it's also okay to tell her you don't
want to continue the relationship
for example you could say
i don't think our relationship can
really recover from this it's just too
painful i think it's time to go our
separate ways
whatever you decide try to look at what
happened as an opportunity to learn and
grow
for instance think about red flags you
might have missed that you can look out
for in future relationships
or things that you could have done to
improve communication between you and
your girlfriend
whether you decide to stay together or
not counseling can help you move on with
your life and learn how to deal with
your feelings in a healthy way
consider seeing a relationship
specialist either by yourself or as a
couple
you can also take care of yourself while
recovering from the affair by spending
time with supportive friends and family
or working on hobbies and projects that
are important to you
since infidelity in a relationship can
put you at risk of catching sexually
transmitted diseases make sure to visit
your doctor to get tested and let your
girlfriend know if you test positive
ask her to get tested too especially if
you plan to continue having a
relationship with her