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Dealing With Relationship Insecurity | 10 Tips To Handle Insecurity

insecurities we all have them whether or

not it's something physical that you're

insecure about like your height your

weight maybe the fact that you got

pointy little ears the sky or maybe your

insecurities stem from a lack of

financial resources you might not have

the nicest car maybe your clothes aren't

exactly as nice as your buddies but

regardless of what you're insecure about

nothing can kill a potentially great

situation like relationship insecurity

so today I thought I'd go over ten tips

for overcoming relationship insecurity

tip number one don't judge your current

relationship based on your previous

relationships right because here's the

deal just because your past girlfriend

boyfriend whatever you're into cheated

on you right doesn't mean that the

current one is cheating on you and

nothing is going to potentially kill a

relationship like making the current

girlfriend boyfriend whenever you're in

to pay for the deeds of your past

boyfriend girlfriend or whatever you're

in sir the beautiful thing about new

relationships is that you get to start

fresh it's like a relationship do-over

so don't have this one up tip number two

don't confuse imagination with reality

right when we start getting insecure we

start imagining some crazy things and

you start reading into everything it's

like oh my god she didn't text back in

five minutes this means that she's

definitely cheating on me I know because

I have been their brother I have been

like the super freaky paranoid guy that

starts reading into everything like oh

my god right well here's the deal what I

learned is that the best way to

basically squash this is to encourage

open and honest communication from the

start but you have to start doing it

when things are good right not when

things are bad don't be like oh we need

to talk and we need to start being

honest because you're going to get weird

and it's going to turn the other person

off superfast encourage communication

from the beginning but don't read in or

you're mine play crazy tricks on you I

know it's hard but you've got to trust

that if the person has something to say

they're going to say it to you leading

us that's it number three which is stop

trying to mind-read you can't mind read

it if you can call Oprah bro because you

are gonna be famous ha ha

you can't mind read nobody can so don't

try ask but tip number four is once you

ask don't keep asking ha ha yeah right

are you sure everything's okay yeah

everything's cool

five minutes later you're sure

something's not bothering you you can

talk to me you know come on open up are

you sure then tomorrow you're like

you're acting weird once you're there

the relationships over dude because

there is nothing that's going to destroy

a potentially good thing like you're

persistent pestering if you ask they say

it's cool you've got to trust them that

it is actually good what am i doing

exactly breathing deep breaths tip

number five your relationship also needs

room to breathe think of a relationship

as a tree a sapling when it's new it's

fresh you plant that sapling what do you

do you nurture it you give it water you

give it some dirt you give it sunshine

you give it room to breathe if you are

constantly standing over top of that

tree waiting and be like come on grow

little tree come on exactly you're gonna

smother it and the same thing happens to

relationships gentlemen it is okay to

have me type not only is it good it is a

critical component to a healthy

relationship all right because if you

were oh like holding on for dear life

and I'm never going to let you out of my

sight that is a breeding ground for big

trouble my friends you need to have your

own things going on you need to have

outside interest outside friends all

right the best and strongest

relationships are with people that have

their own lives right they're

individuals that come together not one

morphed individual that's weird

awkward and a doomed situation tip

number six is understand that

relationships are not always roses

Puppis because here's the deal a lot of

times when we get into a relationship

right a new relationship how great does

that feel like seriously you are walking

on air my friends like yeah and you're

just alright it feels amazing the

endorphins everything is going crazy

well guess what that never lasts it

can't last we cannot and we're not

designed to maintain that level of

emotional endorphin releasing intensity

all right your relationship is going to

go it's going to EV it's going to flow

it's going to have highs it's going to

have lows it's going to have alright

alright the idea is that you don't just

bail it the first time of trouble

alright focus on the good focus on the

positive all right if it's a lasting

relationship and something that is

supposed to be then it's okay all right

don't just freak out just keep nurturing

keep working and eventually it'll work

itself out if it's supposed to tip

number seven I'm going to slow it down

right because a lot of you need to hear

me when I say this do not snoop alright

do not steal their phone or look through

their phone look through text messages

don't break into Facebook don't look in

emails guys I am here to tell you there

is once you reach that point right the

insecurities point at which you feel the

need to snoop you'll never stop because

you'll never trust them and I'm telling

you if you look hard enough you're going

to find something that you're going to

miss read and turn into a situation and

here's the thing right if you look right

and you find something that you want to

question them about what are you going

to do you're going to act weird right

you're not going to come out and or if

you do come out and confront them

they're going to be like yo what you

look through my stuff and you're gonna

be like oh yeah but I had to and then

you're going to try and make up some

excuse of why you needed to look in

their phone and go through 27 text

messages guys I am here to tell you do

not start that situation because once

you start it is impossible to stop

bringing us to tip number eight go with

your gut instincts we all have them

listen to them but if your instinct is

telling you something that's a little

bit off then ask but don't snoop I'm

telling you there is absolutely nothing

positive that comes from it tip number

nine is an important one and that

is there is nobody else who is

responsible for your happiness except

you and vice versa you're not

responsible for anybody else's happiness

except yours and tip number 10

remember that relationships are supposed

to feel good and you're supposed to feel

better being with this person if it

comes to a point where you don't feel

good when you're with somebody chances

are it's not the right person and it's

time to break up is it going to suck

absolutely is it going to be devastating

in her for a while you bet you but if

you missed the video that I did talking

about how to break up like a man there's

a link down in the description

insecurities we all have them but

managing them and knowing how to handle

them when it comes to a relationship is

a key component to you having a happy

healthy and successful relationship

gentlemen you deserve the best so go out

and get it